安全感

我是一个很缺乏安全感的人。生活的种种，不论大事或小事常常都会让我感到不安。很多朋友劝我说不要想太多。的确，我这小小脑袋所想的事情有时也会让我费解。生活中所发生的一些小事常常会让我把它们吹得像牛车轮那么大。糟糕！厨房的窗子没擦干净！这样会不会让我在卖房子的时候卖不到一个好价钱呢？糟糕！我把报纸丢进错误的环保箱里了！这样会不会让地球缩短1年的寿命呢？

我可能是夸张派多过缺乏安全感。我需要将生活里的大小事吹到像牛车轮那么大才能我觉得这才是生活。我希望我的生活可以向火星撞地球般的轰动，热烈。但同时我也很清楚我只不过是地球上几百亿人口当中的一个。要被上帝抽中获得精彩生活的几率是非常小的。所以，我得创造我自己的精彩生活。

若一切都是平淡无奇的，哪生活有什么意思呢？

外国的月亮特别圆

外国的天空也似乎特别蓝。一望无云，像海洋般蓝色的天空在我生长的国家里是看不到的。但在这里，我常常都可以看到这样的蓝天。我好向往飞向这样的蓝天。能在天空中翱翔的鸟儿们应该非常的幸福吧。如果我能够象它们那样自有自在的飞翔，我应该也会觉得幸福的。难怪现在有这么多的人离乡背井到别的国家讨生活，正因为外国的月亮特别圆，天空特别蓝。

不晓得现在家乡的天空又是什么颜色呢？

春天终于到来了

是啊。春天总算在2月15日宣布了它的降临。斯特格尔莫现在每天的平均气温是5度左右。

一个冬季又过去了。一个比往年暖和许多的冬季过去了。由于全球暖化，斯特格尔莫城市在2007年的冬天才不过下了几次的雪。还来不及将整个城市覆盖在白净的冰雪里，还来不及将滔滔的川流冰冻到三尺，冬季就这么过去了。

我好开心喔。因为春季的到来意味着日间渐渐变长，空气渐渐变暖，花草渐渐绽开。虽然我家的胡姬花比起冬天的时候绽放出比较小的花朵，但它还是绽放的很灿烂，很美丽。它们正享受着春天所带来的生命力。在冬天沉睡了的树大哥们也渐渐苏醒了。去了避寒的鸟儿们也开始归巢了。

我好开心喔。因为春天终于到来了。

一棵充满爱的植物

Real Winter

Happy New Year to all! It's the 3rd day of the new year and Stockholm is raining and blowing lots of snow this morning. It is especially beautiful in the morning because the snow lies neat and tidy on the ground, untouched by traces of human activities, yet. Lots of snow is totally romantic, but it can also mean no go-out for me.

I need conjure two spells, one that can shield me from the randoming flying snow and the freezing winds, and one that retrieves my favourite cap which I lost at the supermarket yesterday.

Sawadee!

It was another weekend to be spent at my Parents-in-law's place and so I volunteered to cook some food for dinner.

It's Summer here in Stockholm and fresh groceries at cheap prices are abundant during this period. And I thought it would be appetizing with something sour and spicy. Sawadee it is!

This was what I prepared:

Wok Fried Honey Chicken Bits in Lemon and Oyster Sauce with Leek, Shallots, Rabarber and Ginger

Ingredients needed were simple but the list was quite long. And the most difficult part was de-boning the whole chicken. I stood at the sink for almost 45mins just to get the bones off the meat. Salut to the chicken butchers! No wonder de-boned chicken fillets cost so much more expensive. For the record, it's SEK99 per kg of chicken fillet to SEK20 per kg for one whole chicken. Maybe being a butcher is quite a lucrative business afterall! Ha!

Sarlot's Dreams

I was in Prague between 5-8 Jul together with Olof, who was there to attend a conference. I was totally excited about the trip because I have heard so many good reviews and feedback about this capital city of Czech Republic.

We arrived in style at the Praha international airport with a BMW waiting to whizz us to Mandarin Oriental, situated 10mins away from Charles Bridge. (Karlův most).

Charles Bridge is a stone Gothic bridge that connects the Old Town and Malá Strana. Its construction was commissioned by Czech king and Holy Roman Emperor Charles IV and began in 1357. Baroque statues (a total of 30) began to be placed on either side of Charles Bridge in the 17th century. The most popular statue is probably the one of St. John of Nepomuk, a Czech martyr saint who was executed during the reign of Wenceslas IV by being thrown into the Vltava (river) from the bridge. The statue has been polished to a shine by countless people having touched it over the centuries. Touching the statue is supposed to bring good luck and ensure your return to Prague. I touched it. Ha!

Crossing the Charles Bridge, I stepped into the Old Town. As I meandered through this 12th century old town, hole-in-the-wall shops and cafes lined up along the sides of the narrow but bustling streets, tourists with fat wallets packed the stone pavements, the air in Old Town is filled with commerce and the enthusiasm of a new generation of Czechs who are eager to ride on its booming tourism.

Then I came to know of a 16-year old Czech girl, working as waitress in a hotel as summer job, who aspires to be a Psychologist. But Sarlot has still a long way to go. She has about another 8-10 years before she's any closer to realising her dream. Interestingly, her academic quest to becoming a Psychologist includes 2-4 years of studies in London. According to Sarlot, this is not a pre-requisite, but rather something she wants to do before she enrols into the Czech university. She thinks that fluency in English is very important, if not, extremely important. I really don't know if I can agree with her now, because I think fluency in Swedish is very important, if not, extremely important. Ha!

Back to Sarlot, coming from a blue-collared family, she has reservations whether or not she will be able to reach her goal, since education is not free in Czech. Indeed, this could be one of her biggest obstacles, if not her resolution to succeed. But I believe she will and she can do it, because her eyes sparkle the resolution to make it. I hope to reignite the fire of resolution in me too. I desperately so needed something to propel me forward in this nordic city, where summer temperature clocked at 13degrees celcius when I returned from Prague on Sunday. So summer. I have been lamenting so much about the Swedish weather that it is getting old to me.

Sarlot, all the best to you!

Midsummer 2007 @Gotland, Sweden

Featuring rolling green countryside, forest-lined roads, fine beaches and small fishing villages and the spectacular medieval town of Visby – you’ll find real charm in Gotland. No other area in Scandinavia can boast such a concentration of unspoiled medieval country churches. There are also hundreds – maybe even thousands – of prehistoric sites, including burial mounds, stone ship settings and hill-top fortresses across the island to explore.

This was where Olof and I celebrated Midsummer with his friends too... and some of this friend's friends... and his friend's cousins... and his friend's cousins' friends... quite a big group eh...

Midsummer holiday falls on the Friday of the week where the longest day of the year occurs. This year, it was on 25 Jun. In Stockholm, where we are at the South of the country, the sun rises at 2+am and sets at midnight. In the north, the sun doesn't set at all. Amazing, isn't it?! Midsummer, to me, is a paganish activity. People dance around a big cross decorated with flowers and two big rings of flowers and twigs hung on each end of the horizontal pole. Quite phallic looking actually. Well, Midsummer is a festival that celebrates fertility and good harvests in the summer. But of course, you can imagine the fertility here extends far beyond the crops planted in soil! Indeed, according to one of Olof's cousins, many people are born in Spring, which means their parents conceived them in summer!

Anyway, back to Gotland, the largest of the Baltic islands, was an important trading post from long before Viking times and became a major power base of the Hanseatic League in the 12th and 13th centuries. You can start your trip at Visby, the main port and town of the island, which has been declared a UNESCO World Heritage Site. Walk around the magnificent three-kilometre city wall, which dates from the end of the thirteenth century. It was built to isolate the city's foreign traders from the islanders and has over 40 towers.

Wander through narrow roads and lanes...

Back to Capital of Scandinavia

After all the wedding buzz and fuss, I am finally back to Stockholm again. I can't help but to lament, "Time flies!".

3 weeks ago, I officially assumed a new identity - Mrs Lundstrom. What has changed really? I still look like me and still think like me.

No, something has changed. Something.

Since I returned to Stockholm, an overwhelming sense of lost came over me. What is next in stall for me in this Capital of Scandinavia? I thought being a housewife is quite a nifty idea, but it seems to me this idea is extinct in this city. Everybody here now are yearning to know what's my next step in life. Scary...